Breaking Tradition

This has not been a year of traditions in my house.

Didn't get to see 4th of July fireworks because we were driving into Richmond, our new town.

Didn't get to smell a turkey roasting in the oven on Thanksgiving because I ordered food from Cracker Barrel.

Didn't wait until Christmas morning to open presents because we will be out of town, so we had Christmas today.

This year has been different.  So many changes.  Houses.  Schools.  Jobs.  Communities.  Friends.

This week has been challenging.  The plague seems to be going through our house, as almost everyone has been sick at some point.  The thought of a long weekend stuck inside with 4 kids, and few distractions seemed like cruel and unusual punishment on myself.  So we sent an email to Santa and suggested that it might be a good idea that he come early.

He set his alarm for 4am to leave gifts under the tree, to fill stockings, and to leave a note upstairs by our bedrooms.  Since this was unexpected, we didn't actually all get out of bed until 7:30, which was nice.  The kids are happy, enjoying their gifts, and hanging out.  Since most of them are still sick, we didn't even attempt church.

I have never once EVER let my kids open their presents early.  I always had to wait for Christmas morning.  So would they.  It's TRADITION!!

But on Christmas Eve, we will be heading to my parents house.  The 6 of us and a St. Bernard in a mini-van.  It doesn't leave a lot of extra room for a sleigh full of gifts.  Plus, the older boys wouldn't be able to use their presents until we got back home, so it just seemed like a better idea to do everything early.

I haven't decided if this year's break with our normal holiday traditions is just a healthy adaptation to the changes in our lives, or if it's just laziness and apathy.

Probably a combination.

Did you drop (or add) any traditions this year?

Skinny Jeans

Skinny jeans.  An ethical dilemma in two parts...

This is going to be short and sweet.  You're welcome.

Background:

My daughter has a fear of public bathrooms.  This has created a problem in Kindergarten.  On occasion  she has an accident that requires a change of clothes.  These are usually kept in a ziploc bag in her backpack.  But I have 4 kids, I'm forgetful, and there have been times that ziploc bag remains empty on the floor of my laundry room, and the school has been kind enough to lend her clothes from their emergency stash.

Now...to my ethical dilemma...

PART 1:

She had changed immediately into pajamas when she got home from school on Monday, so I didn't realize that she had had an accident, and that the nurse had lent her jeans.  The next morning she put them back on.  They were skinny jeans.  They had sparkly buttons.  She was rocking them.

I muttered a bad word under my breath.  It rhymed with itch.

I seriously stared at my 5 year old in those skinny jeans and was jealous.  J-E-A-L-O-U-S!!!  I don't think that I ever would have looked that good in a pair of jeans.  Even at the age of 5, years before my bottom half was distorted by pregnancies and a long term carb addiction.

Dilemma 1...is it wrong to be completely jealous of a 5 year old girl that can rock a pair of skinny jeans?

PART 2:

She looks so good in those jeans!  I'm talking "sisterhood of the travelling pants" good!  I want to keep them, and send a different pair back for the stash that the nurse keeps in her office.  I mean, to look that good in a pair of jeans is a very special thing, right?  I have every right to vicariously live through her, right???

Dilemma 2...is it wrong to send back a different pair of jeans (or 2) so that my daughter can look completely adorable?


Since my moral compass is apparently broken, I would appreciate any input.

As long as you say that I won't go to hell for being jealous of a 5 year old, and that I can send in a different pair of jeans.  (or 2)

the great un-birthday experiment...

So my birthday was last Monday.  With it came the end of an experiment I started last year on my birthday.  I decided to go an entire year without wishing anyone happy birthday via facebook post.

Why?  Just cuz.
No really...why?   Because!
Seriously, why????   Because facebook happy birthday postings are annoying!!!

OK...don't get me wrong.  I am a huge supporter of making a big deal out of people's birthdays.  I spent an entire year terrorizing the women in my Sunday school class with what stupid thing I would do next, just for the sake of their birthdays.

Blindfolded and kidnapped for ice cream?  CHECK!
Kitchen cabinets and drawers re-arranged?  CHECK!
A birthday breakfast in bed for the night owl among us?  CHECK!
A car full of balloons and shredded paper?  CHECK!
A Happy 40th birthday message on the sign at the grain elevator when the birthday girl was only 37?  CHECK...wait...they did that to ME!!!  (Payback is a bitch)

A properly celebrated birthday is a joy forever.  I love when people make a big deal out of my birthday!!  This year's desk full of "stephanie" confetti was the highlight of my day!

Facebook happy birthdays aren't the same thing though, are they?  ARE THEY?  Facebook makes it too easy to wish someone a happy birthday.  They remind you about the birthday for a week.  On the day of the birthday, they remind you to comment.  (You don't even have to go to someone's wall anymore, they have a quick add feature where you can just cut and paste "Happy Birthday!! Have a great day" as many times as you need, click enter and done.)

Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy!!

TOO EASY!! And now they have facebook gifts...so you don't even have to think about what to buy.

I am a traditionalist.  I feel that birthdays should be an honored part of the annual "Transfer info to the new calendar" ceremony.  They should be handwritten on squares that are too small.   They should be written in ink as an act of love and commitment to a friendship.  (Except for my husband's.  His is written in pencil.  One time...ONE TIME...the first year we were married...I wrote his birthday on the wrong date.  18 years later and I still haven't heard the end of it, and now I always have to second guess myself when asked when his birthday is...the 22nd?  the 25th?  Crap...)  Keep in mind, I love my google calendar that is synced to my phone.  And all the birthdays are in there anyway, so I have a back up...but those people that are handwritten in...those are the special ones.

And there are those that you may not actually write in the squares any more...time and distance and circumstances might not require you to celebrate.  But you should remember them.  I remember that November 17th is Cindy's.  She was my best friend in 1st grade.  March 22nd was my friend Beth's.  She passed away a few years ago.  October 19th is a big one.  I have 3 friends with that birthday.  Haven't seen any of them in at least 10 years.  November 25th is my sister in law's...which I forgot to put on the calendar on my refrigerator, but remembered every single time that I walked passed it for a month...then was appropriately chastised by my 7 year old son for not writing it on there when she was visiting for Thanksgiving.  Monica, it is on there now...in crayon.  I love you!  Remember all the things I do right, OK??

So, while I appreciate all 67 birthday greetings I got this year, I doubt that the cousin of a high school friend who needed more neighbors in farmville 2 years ago REALLY cares whether or not I had a great birthday.  She probably has me hidden from her news feed anyway.

My co-worker sent me this last week...after listening to the verbal form of this post in its original form.  Classic. Brilliant. Truly a laugh out loud moment:

Precedent!  The mother's milk of, you know, makin' your point and bein' right!! - Donna Moss

Happy Birthday...I hope you had a great day! - Me